One of the most herculean tasks in a relationship is dealing with the ex-boyfriend /girlfriend factor. The simple weird inkling that ‘’once sexed can be re-sexed’’ instills constant paranoia in love relationships . Girls are always scared of leaving their boyfriends loose when their exes are around and likewise. ”Even you get nkong na how” . The fear is that the dead embers of the ex-relationship can be reignited like ABC.
Yea! This is quite true. A majority of girls have testified to me that their boyfriends have always had scores to settle with their exes. Some lay claim to their partner that they are just friends now and nothing can happen. To me, a possible reconciliation will largely depend on how fatal the break up was. If the cause of the break up was due to a mediocre reason like ‘’He wasn’t giving me gifts’’, what if he pledges to start giving her gifts.
When a girl starts receiving gifts from her ex-boyfriend, it’s simply a signal of imminent disaster. Girls are naturally soft-hearted to forgive their ex-boyfriends once they are apologetic. Of course a girl can easily stick to one partner which is quite a hard thing for a man to do. Boys are often hailed by their peers for dating many girls but a girl is reprimanded for that. If you ain’t jealous when your boyfriend receives gifts from his ex-girlfriend, then you truly don’t love him. Or will you just act like an ‘’I don’t care lady’’ and play cool? You fit loss that battle !
Jude and Loveline have been in love for a 2 years and it’s been smooth and flourishing. Jude and her ex-girlfriend broke up because she suspected him of cheating on her without any concrete evidence. 1 year later, she starts making advances to Jude for reconciliation after discovering Jude wasn’t guilty of cheating on her. Unfortunately for her, Jude just had a new flourishing relationship with Loveline. Jude has been receiving calls and love text messages from her which he doesn’t find dismal or repellent in any way. Jude’s ex-girlfriend has been apologetic and offers him an iPhone as a token of ‘’I am truly sorry for all what happened in the past, let’s please turn a new page”. IF NA YOU?
His girlfriend's dream !
A vast majority of girls have voracious appetite for affluent and famous people. For instance, your girlfriend might dump you if Samuel Eto'o approaches her for a love affair. The more famous you become, the more your chances increase of getting more girls hanging around you , beeping for you to call back or getting anonymous calls from admirers. ''Money don cam'' . Girls always associate themselves with people who have already made it in life or have prospects of success in the nearest future. That future should n't be too far else you lose it. Your girlfriend must be Heaven-sent to be able to persevere with you when you are wretched. Reason why most of them in Cameroon love scammers. Some may have the mind to endure but peer pressure always induces them to bite more than what they can chew; ''my friend , you di chop na love?'' They find no value in a boy who is in rags or struggling to succeed in life. What then do they always want ? Money and Flattery ! .You should be able to impress her with money and gifts ,the way you carry yourself and sometimes tell lies for you to sway her mind to fall for you. If you don't do that, her friends might influence her to drop you.
Catch the drift of this story!
My friend James took his girlfriend Irene out to a nightclub to have fun. Arriving at the club, Irene spots the presence of an international celebrity at the VIP corner ,a movie star. After settling down with her boyfriend, she keeps throwing her eyes at the VIP corner, momentarily losing concentration , distracted by the splendour . She later gets out of control and tells her boyfriend that she 'll like to go and take a pic with the celebrity. Her boyfriend tells her to go but warns her to spend few minutes there. Irene walks to the VIP corner, and after taking the pic, the celeb appreciates her gorgeousness and tells her to sit down and take a drink. Carried by the appreciation of her beauty by a celeb and craving to taste fame, she abandons James under the air conditioner . James gets annoyed and leaves the club quite disappointed. They later break up due to her act. How do you feel ?
''Bushfalling'' has been a recurrent cause of love relationship break ups in Cameroon. To my own conviction, love is a phenomenon that deserves to be spiced with sterling aspects like trustworthiness,utter commitment, proper communication and fidelity. These qualities are often breached once your boyfriend or girlfriend travels abroad. It is evident that most ''bushfallers'' find a comfort zone cheating on the partners they leave back home. Can distance be a focal cause ?
Some develop the desire to be independent, get attracted to another person or some in a bid to get ''permanent stay'' abroad breach trust .Other reasons abound.
My close friend and University classmate Effundem recounted a story of how she broke up with her boyfriend Njie a year after he ''fell bush''. She says her boyfriend traveled to Poland in December 2010 for greener pasture after promising her marriage . Njie stayed in contact with her for about a year during which he constantly sent her to ''Western Union'' .You wise ! . She remained faithful during these period. This relationship got into wrecks when Njie informed his girlfriend that his visa had expired and he needed to marry a ''sara chap'' and impregnate her to acquire ''docky''. Their relationship deteriorated from phone call. Njie glaringly explained this to Effundem saying it will be for their betterment if he gets a permanent stay in Poland. Now, Effundem's problem is that Njie is going to have sex with that woman, have a child out wedlock and this will definitely bring their marriage promise in ruins. Njie ended up marrying the Polish lady while Effundem immediately replaced Njie. Bushfalling just caused their separation. What do you think ?